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Jul08

15 Cupmatch Violations to Avoid This Year

Categories // Cup Match

by @terri2kool 15 Cupmatch Violations to Avoid This Year

Ay buh!

Cupmatch season is back! While we are still getting over the BHW vibes, there is no time to waste in the annual pursuit of which side of de island will take home de Cupmatch cup.

Last year we introduced the Cupmatch 10 Commandments! This year we decided to revisit those rules and share wif you lot how you can be in violation of dem dings without even knowing it!

Now you have a few weeks to get ya life together before Cupmatch. Make sure you plan accordingly, because we lots gonna be watching you and if we see any violations, we will be writing Cupmatch tickets!

So here's 15 Cupmatch Violations to Avoid This Year

1. Wearing De Wrong Teams Colours to de Field

This probably de ULTIMATE violation anybody can commit during Cupmatch. Starting now, you lot better be pleding ya allegiance to de proper team OR ELSE!

2. Failing to Call Ya Taxi Driver De Wednesday Before de Holidee

You lot’s got shree weeks to line up ya trans from now. Tell ya bredrins and ya acegurls what de deal is so guys can line up de payments. Nuffin like getting to cupmatch weekend and tryna decide if ya gonna pay rent on time.

3. Not Going Shopping and Buying At Least 4 Presses. Bathing Suits Included!

De shops in tahn and all cross de island are FILLED with ya team’s colours. There is NO EXCUSE for you not having options for de field or de beach, and de sessions after de game. We lot don’t wanna see you in non-team colours this summer, PERIOD!

4. Failing to Send Aside August’s Rent Money

Getting back to rent money. Set that ding aside NOW. Pay ya landlord or lady in advance (if you can). If you can’t please make sure to budget for cupmatch accordingly. Guys ain’t got no room for you at our yard, unless you wanna sleep on de grass.

5. Agreeing With De Tapped Bie at De Game Who Knows Nothing About What Is Going On

You don’t have to know a lot about cricket but you sha know when de guy next to you is full hot and just talkin’ trash about de game for no reason other than to hear himself talk. Be ware of the de drunken commentary.

6. Failing Asleep At De Field or At a Party

Ay buh! Get plenty of rest in deze next few weeks as you gear up for de big weekend. We have no problem putting you lot on blast if we catch ANY of you sleeping on de field or tryna catch a nap in de back of de party.

7. Acting Dopey for NO Reason At All

Being a bimpert is cute, PSYCHE! It is never okay to be THAT PERSON during Cupmatch season. Get yaself together and be sure to rid yourself of any weird antics leading up to game. Cupmatch is de time of de year where de ramifications of your actions can be social suicide. Just ask Jillionaire about we lot.

8. Not Knowing How to Handle Ya "Refreshments"

Adding on to #7, She's one ding to have some fun, but don't be that sloppy person up de field ruining de vibes

9. Failing to Get De Proper Flotation Device and Shades for Non-Mariners

Non-mariners is no joke! Don’t come out to de water without ya gear thinking guys are gonna spot you “this one time”. We lot have heard it all before.

10. Buying Groceries De Day Before De game

Nah! If you want to starve during Cupmatch, go head and do this here one! See what happens, when de staff look at your wif de rudest side-eye you have EVER seen of ya life, when you ask for Ginger Beer, Black, or anything else you need to have an epic Cupmatch experience.

11. Not Buying Tickets to De Criss Sessions In Advance

There are PLENTY of annual Cupmatch events for you to attend this year. Don’t be a lemon and try get ya tickets at de gate but ya reallym just left outside waiting de whole night. Get ya bleedy tickets early, hear me?

12. Attempting to Get Ya Hair Done De Week of De Game

Nah, ladies! We know how important a new do is to complete ya outfit. And fellas, we understand how a fresh clip can be different between ya ding coming over for de night. But unless you set up an appointment in advance, do try and run rahn to ANY body’s shop looking to walk in and get taken care of. NOT GONNA HAPPEN!

13. Not Preparing a Bottle of Limacol to Combat De Heat

You may think this one is most important for people who dance in de May 24th parade. But de wonders of Limacol can be used at Cupmatch as well. Get you one good spray bottle, add some limacol and a bit of water. You will thank us later. Especially when that Bermy sun is beating on ya skin.

14. Failure to Charge Your Phone de Night Before de Game

If you plan on being to de game, de beach, or some other location where access to electricity is limited, make sure ya phone is charged at 100% before you leave ya yard. Bring an extended battery pack or a secondary battery just in case plans change throughout de day.

15. Not Calling De Family to Confirm De Spot is Secure for De Campsite

Yes. We lot know ya family has been camping at de same spot for generations. Still it is a nice gesture to contact one of your older relatives (i.e. your parents, ya aunty or uncle) to make sure guys are still following tradition this year. Nuffin like showing up to de family spot only to find out guys changed de plans this year.


I am sure you lot have some other violations you want to share with fellow Bermudians. So go ahead, soundoff in the comments or connect with us on social!

You can link up wif Terri on her twitter! @terri2kool