7 Vays to Stay Sane this 2017 Elackshun Season

Ay buh!
Wif erryding happening lately and wid de campaigns ramping up their “style” - using dat term loosely - we lot thought it’s de perfect time to shurr wif you lot 7 pinterest simple ways to keep ya sanity during 2017’s elackshun.

Starting ha awf…. Numba 7

7. Avoid Youtube like dat one Weird Cuzzin 
Serz. Not only do you have to dreadfully watch 5 LONG SECONDS of political propaganda when tryna look up tutorials on how to freeze ice wif out ah fridge - dun’een ax ha we stahted watchin dis - but ya criss music playlist gets cut in de middle of de chorus to hear about how aceboy promised you this and what not.

6. Know ya Candidate
Easiest way to stay sane is knowing who's de realest of ya constichewency. Errywun knows ya got some fakers that show up once jus to show they “curr” but dat one bie been dea all dat time helping errywun.


5. Lock Ya Door, windows, Hide yo Kids, Hide yo Wife
Cuz they canvassing errybody out hurr fa a vote.


4. Not Voting? Take a Vacay and Come back fa Cupmatch
Pack ya bags and go as far as you can buh… Hurrd Australia nice rahn dis time… plus that 23hour flight of peace and quiet from Bermy.

Speaking ov Cupmatch…

3. Knit yaself ah Cupmatch Outfit
Anodda vay to distract yaself is.... Pull up ah chair nax to grenny, turn on young and de restless and let dem fingers twine up a criss lace romper just in time to trendset ah new Cupmatch press


2. Rum, Chivas, Swizzle, Whaeva, Pick ya poison


1. Stay off Social media...
...unless ya coming shru to check BERMEMES wif de latest de bess way to avoid de whole fiasco, scandals, posts, ads, tweets and errding else in between

*this is satire buh but if you wanna show us ya criss knitted cupmatch press, send it shru to us*